Archive for the ‘De-stress’ Category

working mother new year resolutions

Thursday, December 31st, 2009

The Chinese have a concept of the“year of” for every New Year. If I have to declare the “year of” for 2010, it would be the year of Women, or the year of Moms. Moms are amazing. Mothers have taken on more responsibility and leadership every single year, from child care, to elder care, to making the home an amazing place. Women are also powerful executives, powerful forces in the higher education realm and driving forces in many community service projects. I have witnessed many women in my life taking care of elderly parents. Every employee at LifeWorx speaks with Mothers all day long, and we serve many working Mothers throughout Westchester, NY, Fairfield, CT and Westport, CT. Many of these Mothers in CT & Westchester are single, married, and some are even taking care of multiple children, as well as running the entire household. We believe this is more than a full time job, and commend these powerful women for taking charge in so many different areas of their lives.

In the current recession, women have continued working while many of their husband have been laid off. Of the 10 million job losses, ¾ of these losses have been men. How long with women continue to work so hard without receiving any time of relief? I say this not to discount the role of men, because as a male provider, we work very hard too. However, my sensitivity toward women is because they take on more physical and emotional challenges as they become overloaded. Many of these efforts have not yet been recognized by society at large.

Here is a suggestion for New Years Resoltuions for Busy Moms:

  1. Take 4 hours a week for yourself
  2. Take the time to enjoy a book you have been anxiously awaiting
  3. Take a walk
  4. Join a new yoga class
  5. Go to the gym and enjoy a great working
  6. Find a new hobby with a friend that you find fulfilling

Consider this as a time you are investing in yourself in order to give more to your family, and ultimately to yourself. Many times throughout parenthood, I felt guilty and worried when I took time to take care of myself. This was a mistake! I now know that taking this personal time is vital in becoming a stronger and more balanced individual. It is important to take these New Years Resolutions in steps. Simple resolutions and suggestions such as taking 4 hours for myself every week became manageable, simple, flexible and valuable.

happy thanksgiving with a positive attitude in tough times

Tuesday, November 24th, 2009

As a business owner, I, like many of you, have been worried about the economy for most of this year. The job market has gotten worse for most Americans and the economy is improving very slowly. How can we reflect on this with a bit more courage than fear? When I was in the high school, a teacher once told me that the things we consider to be stressful are nothing compared with the stress of thousands of years ago. The teacher said, “Imagine being on a farm and living in a small community of 100 or so people in the middle of Mexico, or a settlement of Native Americans outside of New York along the Hudson River.” The memory was tucked away somewhere in my head and it keeps coming back to me when I see myself overly worried. The teacher said, “When they lived in these communities a long time ago, they sowed seeds and counted on rain for the crop to grow, harvest and provide the essential food. Often, there were droughts for 2-3 years in a row, all of the farm animals died, the community was malnourished and they wondered among the few survivors who would die next.” She exclaimed, “That is stressful!”

This provides us with a perspective to allow all of us to accept everything that comes our way in life. Please don’t get me wrong, I enjoy luxuries, but when there are emotional challenges or stressful moments, I reflect on two main things…  (1) That what I am facing is little compared to others and (2) That we as humans have tremendous capacity to handle stress. To conquer stress, we need to be aware of it, put it in perspective and find ways to de-stress. Doing yoga in 100 degree weather in India is of course a great way to de-stress. The other thing that gives us the ability to handle stress and challenge is a mindset to justify it as “God’s” way of sending me to the School of Emotional Growth”. We go to school and college to build intellectual growth, we go to the gym and run on the trail to get physically fit, we visit church or temple or a retreat to get religion or spiritual growth and we enjoy parties and events to build relational maturity. However, the two most important things we have with us are instincts and emotional strength.  These are brought to us through generations and these are assets of much higher value then the economy. We know the economy will come back and hope it comes back soon for our community. Happy Thanksgiving and hope everyone finds lots of love peace and joy.

women who nurture and help me grow

Thursday, October 29th, 2009

People around us help us grow.  In my last fifteen years as a single parent I have had the fortune of many talented ladies who have cared for me and brought me lasting joy.  Helen Ansari my aerobics, zumba and yoga instructor at the Saw Mill Club in Mount Kisco, New York gave me the gift of great health.  It is hard to believe that I have been taking her exercise classes for the last 20 years.  She cares and motivates everyone to do their best, but above all she is talented at making the workout exciting. Helen is a breast cancer survivor and active with ACS.  Darya, our god sent housekeeper, was amazing at helping my family with housecleaning, cooking and childcare.  She helped us for four years.  I have been fortunate to have two massage therapists, one for five years and another, more recently, for two years.  Ali, from Cold Springs, NY massaged away all my tensions but unfortunately, three years ago she moved to Vermont.  Now Kristen from New York City heals and helps me.  She has the talent to make anyone’s body and mind soar from the depths of tensions, aches, and pains!  Terry was my dance instructor and Marcia provided executive coaching. And Adalita makes my home spic and span. She is extremely reliable and trustworthy like the sunshine in San Diego. Also, all my lady friends have taught me how to have some fun.

My late wife Candy was always nurturing our home, our son, and our family. She adapted to all the challenges of life in stride.  She taught me how to relate to people on their level and every level.

My mom taught me courage, effort, and integrity.  From as early as I can remember to the day she passed away – for all of her 85 years of life – she found ways to enjoy life.  For my mom, work was worship and family was joy.  I feel the same way.

We all have choices in life – which people to keep around us for example, to nurture, make our lives simple, and help us grow.  I am fortunate and grateful to have an amazing group of talented, caring, and nurturing people to help me.  Now I am working on giving back to all those people that need it, particularly moms.

helping moms de-stress

Tuesday, October 20th, 2009

I attended the “Go Red for Women Round Table Forum” last Friday at the Hilton in Rye Brook, New York and heard approximately 100 attendees share their experiences about being a mom! There were professional moms, moms of five kids, moms with three step kids, entrepreneurial moms, working late at night moms, young moms, pre-menopausal moms, cancer survivor moms, cardiovascular disease survivor moms, yoga moms, soccer moms, real moms, super moms etc. All of the moms discussed the things that keep them awake at night and what to do about them. The forum was full of great ideas and successful stress reducing techniques. For example, there was a mom cardiologist who brought awareness to the issue that moms have a lot of stress and need to take care of themselves. She talked about letting go, not feeling guilty, doing only what you can, and not sweating what you can’t get done. She went on to suggest getting the kids involved to make household chores easier, taking time for yourself, getting your nails done, not competing with other moms, and finally, being comfortable with yourself. All of the ideas shared were great ideas. Here are the 5 key nuggets from the forum for reducing stress:

  • Make a list of what you want to do along with what you don’t want to do
  • Use your emotional and intellectual strength to execute
  • Find time to recharge yourself
  • Let go of stuff that does not bring lasting value
  • Delegate the tasks that you can do at work, at home, and everywhere else

At LifeWorx, we try to bring moms peace and rest by providing good help at their home. By having an implemented strategy of organization, process, and systems, we can gather a team of professionals to take charge and provide reliable, trustworthy and much needed help to busy moms. None of our experts will replace a mom; her work is precious, but one day when we have helped all moms, we will sleep well too.